English is my first language, anytime of the day.
but that doesn't mean that i'm kicking my Malay language as faaaaaaaaaaaaaar away as i can. nonono! it's just that i've been talking in English since i was small and it kinds of absorb itself in me. but since i don't want anyone to think i'm sidetracking my half-roots (since my ancestors varies in terms of race), i do my best to practice the best Bahasa Melayu when i speak. seriously, like, the best Malay language because in my opinion, if i wanted to speak a certain language, might as well i portray the beauty of the language, isn't it? so i don't do curses or ruining the Malay word by spelling it wrongly.
example : kita -----> kitewwwwwww *duckface*
geddit?
i believe that what we say portrays the level of education and quality of environment that we live in. surely if we go around shouting curses people would think that we came from a bad environment because a good person don't curse so freely, regardless whether in real life or in the net. so yeahhh i can say my language usage is more towards plain and careful with a bit of restrain in everything so as not to provoke people. (something the Malay would label as 'skema'.) i guess if i can't speak anything good or morally encouraging, i should better be off keeping quiet rather than offend people with what i'm saying.
because........it is not an easy task to take care of everyone's feeling. seriously.
and our tongue can turn out to be so sharp we could actually skin people aliveeeeee.
my weakness is that i am not a good person when i'm angry. i'll turn into a devil, even in my silent attempt at controlling my anger. if i were to have my way with my anger, a lot of people might be dead by now. i guess a Bugis is a Bugis, hot temper and stubborn. so if i am angry, i will not speak Malay but i will speak English instead. because i think the kind of curse that we have in Malay language is too harsh. if it's in English, i can at least say something funny like butterfly over my head! monkey's lipstick! tortoise beard! which is kind of funny and it doesn't sound harsh at all. moreover, in a way it helps reduce my anger and i'll be calm immediately.but of course, there's no denial that the best word that a Muslim should say when angry is zikrullah. :)
i don't think i have to prove to anyone about my standard of Malay language because i've proven it in my SPM cert and daily life. i try my best to say only the good words and compliment more instead of bashing because human nature being what it is, we don't like bad things thrown in our face, right? but of course, i don't have any problem conversing in Malay with anyone. when i'm discussing ideas, i'd like to say i will blurt out all those baku Malay sentences impromptu. some of the person that i respect a lot also use the baku Malay like my pal Syukri Sapuan, sis Najwa and Syahirah. these are thinking people and i greatly admire how their brain works because seriously, their knowledge is obviously portrayed in the way they deliver their ideas through oral presentation a.k.a speaking.
aren't i blessed?
however, speaking English like a bullet train does not make me a lesser Malay. i still enjoy eating rice with hand, still know the importance of respecting elders and culture. although i prefer western food with lesser kuah, i'd finish a whole pot of my mother's cooking thee heeee. speaking English does not make you a lesser Malay. it's good that we have the intention to uphold our Malay language but if we still speak rojak Malay, how can we elevate our Malay language? thoughts to ponder hmmmm.
if anyone try to be irritating saying things like 'why don't you speak in your mother tongue?', 'you must be some kind of mat saleh wannabe speaking English, aren't you?', 'ek elehh kerek la kau cakap omputih pulak' and yadda yadda yadda, i would smile amusingly at them. i mean, surely most of the people that says those mean thing is people who aren't really fluent in English, isn't it? instead of improving themselves, they choose to be a frog and annoy other people.
well excuse me, i'd speak English all i want because i'm used to it. if my Mandarin is superb, i'd rant in Mandarin too. when you have acquire a second language, it's not wrong to use the language in your daily life. back then when i was a child i was literally hooked on the Thai drama that was aired every evening at 4.30 pm. i was so into Thai dramas that i started picking up the language. when my father saw this, he started getting interested too and surprise, surprise, my father's spoken Thai is waaaaay better than me. i could only remember the basic now. my father can have a conversation in Thai anytime he wants! yay for dad! mind you he learn Thai all on his own by watching Thai drama, buying beginner's introduction to Thai and he even practice writing in Thai plus teaching my younger sister how to write Thai too! gosh, my father is a superhero!
growing up in a family with nothing much on our back except education, we never let ourselves succumb to the skeptical judgmental attitude of the majority of Malaysian. i know i am good in English. therefore i strive hard to achieve whatever certificate exist in English since back in primary school. of course, my teachers were extremely encouraging and supportive so yeahh i kind of sweep clean all the English competition in school hahaha. story telling, choir, essay writing, drama, i join them all. but that doesn't stop there. i join all the malay categories too! i am a possessive, selfish, power-hungry person, ehem.
one of the best compliment that i get was from my secondary school teacher, Madam Rashidah. she remarks that my essay for mid sem is waaaay too mature for a school-goer. all because i add in some bad elements of romance in my essay and ended the story in a tragic way where the girl was burn in a Porsche, leaving her with a jagged face and paralyzed body . i tell you what, teenagers are very good at this kind of thing. the thing is, they are not brave enough to put it in writing. i think it is important to write stories that could excite the audience and make them want more so there you go, Madam Rashidah! *peace*
the vital thing is, speak whatever language that you want, if it make you feel good. English is sure as heck important in this modern time because everything is literally in English. so, learn English and be very good at it so that when you travel to foreign country like Europe, you won't have to be so embarrassed when you ask for direction or wanted to start a conversation with the western people. they encourage you to speak English, actually. besides, your parents will be so proud of you can speak another language fluently. i think every parents want us to be a better generation than them so they never hesitate in ensuring we get the best education available. go thank and hug your parents!
remember, just because someone speak English very good, it doesn't mean they are a lesser patriotic product of their race. i'm an English mumbler but i do love my roots more than anything else. i love my country but not the politician obviously. of course, there will be some influences that you will received from the English culture but that's part and parcel of the language. the culture of the native speaker will be indirectly assimilate in the language itself. when you speak English, you will undeniably at some point follow the Englishman manner of speaking and intonation. the same rules apply to other languages so there's no harm in drinking tea and eating cereals, seriously. nasi lemak contain lots of coconut milk which is not really good for our body. we should take only the good aspects in everything and try our best to avoid the bad influences. i am a future English teacher, insyaAllah, but i don't have any problem teaching Islamic studies or Bahasa Melayu because i live in a home where education is vital and we should not be an empty can. well, can't say the same about math though. geez i despise math.
i could go on and on and on conveying my thoughts on English but i think this post is long enough and i am sure whoever read this blog (either by chance or by deliberation) gets the idea of what i wanted to convey.
keep calm, speak English and eat nasi lemak yehaaaa!
toodles.
